Teller

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

The mountains of Milliways don't really fit with the landscape, being raised after the fact. They are, however, interesting spots to visit. Plenty of trails, plenty of caves, plenty of critters. And the occasional opening subtly marked with a delta, as there is a world of difference between a mere cave and an opening of the Labyrinth.

Sometimes this distinction is a helpful one in warning people away. Sometimes it just leads to interesting tunnels- why is the place lit, anyway? Where does this passage go? How far into the mountains does this thing extend?

... why did the stone walls give way to metal, and what's the deal with the reinforced door up ahead?

Comments

[doesntsaymuch]

Maybe he's having a bit of a Scooby-Doo moment, but Teller decides to go check out the door.

Maybe it leads back to the bar. When wandering around in countless caves and tunnels, one rather loses their orientation and bearings, and for all he knows, he could have easily been so far turned round that he wound up under the impossible building.

Managing to push open the door, however, he realises that the building was even more impossible than he'd thought.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

If only because it appears to have a door that leads directly into the side of a subway car. Not a functioning one, just... a subway car. One crusted with dirt and age and corrosion, and not lit up in the slightest.

Oh, and it smells. Like foot. Like every foot in the world, ever, all at once.

[doesntsaymuch]

For a moment, Teller thinks he'd wound up back in New York. He's heard that people get to and from the bar in more ways than just the front door, after all.

And then he realises that not even the station by his apartment is this bad.

What the fuck?

He decides to turn back. This does not seem like a good place to be hanging back. But when he turns to open the door he'd just come through, he's rather annoyed to find that it only opens into a small service duct.

So not cool. :-|


Well, there's nothing for it. He reaches into his attaché case, pulling out a small little penlight, and starts following the rails.

Even if this isn't New York, there's bound to be a station eventually, right?

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

Yup. Two or three cars down, in fact, the tunnel opens out into a station- a big one, tracks running in each direction... and with no power or light discernible anywhere. If the air here's moved any time recently it's because oh hey the roaches are bigger than the rats here! Who knew?

[doesntsaymuch]

Teller works and lives with cockroaches.

And not just because it's New York. He actually likes the damn things.

He does have to jump a bit when his light lands on something that resembles the sort of thing B-grade horror films were made of. Seriously, that's a damn big roach.

Luckily, it's far away.

The station is a welcome sight, and Teller sets out exploring it, hoping to find a way back outside.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

There's a long-neglected concrete bench with unpleasant-looking stains sunk into it on the island between the two sets of train tracks. Here and there a few trash cans can be found, along with scattered tin cans and empty soda bottles, and lumps of things probably best left to the giant roaches. At some point Teller's light will undoubtedly flicker over the remains of ancient, peeling advertising posters- a terribly earnest man in a doughboy helmet, clutching a shovel and pointing at the camera (Where will YOU be when the Holocaust arrives?); a little girl in pigtails gleefully clutching at a metallic horse's neck (Every Girl's Fantasy, Now A Reality- Only $16,000!); some sort of three-armed metal beachball thing clutching a mop, a bucket, and a box (Mr. Handy Recommends ABRAXO!).

As the light starts to flash over the words Lend A Hand For Uncle Sam, the edge of the beam catches on something much closer: a locked escalator, or at least a flight of stairs.

[doesntsaymuch]

What...?

Well, Toto. I don't think we're in Kansas any more.

The Cold War isn't exactly over yet (and won't be for another few years, still), but people have stopped being terrified like this for a while.

And what the hell is a Mr. Handy?

He's starting to get seriously bothered by the time he catches the stairs. Maybe he can get out of here and get back to somewhere familiar. :D!

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

It's possible. That would depend on how familiar he is with the subway line map posted on the side of the ticket booth that's up at the top of the stairs.

Oh, and there's a sign on the wall, too, indicating Museum of History and Monuments, with an arrow pointing to the wider trash-lined corridor beyond the long-broken turnstiles.

[doesntsaymuch]

Now, Teller knows that DC is not this bad. Sure, it's been a while since he's been up this way, but something like this would have been on the news.

Never mind that he doesn't watch the news. Penn does, and that man talks about everything.

Still, he can't just stand here. Heaving a sigh, he jumps the turnstiles and decides to follow the pointing arrow.

Arrows aren't usually in the habit of leading to dead ends, he reasons.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

No, they're not. This one points to a wide, gently up-sloping tunnel, albeit one left in a chipped and ruined state by the passage of time. Although the red and white Nuka-Cola machine off to the left looks to be in pretty good condition. Sturdy bit of work, that.

The tunnel takes a turn to the left after the soda machine, posters (See the Actual Virgo II Lunar Lander! Marvel at the Majestic Cosmos! In the MUSEUM OF TECHNOLOGY!) still plastering the walls- but more importantly, there's daylight here, and concrete stairs leading upward.

[doesntsaymuch]

Even though the basic design is familiar, Teller does not trust this soda machine, and stays on the far end of the tunnel.

But, hey! Daylight!

Teller doesn't run, but he comes damn close to it.



Seriously, this place is starting to creep him out.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

The big green corpse slumped over half the stairs probably won't help, then. It's bigger than Penn and what's left of its attire looks like someone hacked up a shipment at the Leather Impact store on 38th to sew the tougher pieces together for armor. Not armor that helped, ultimately. Alas, poor greenskin.

[doesntsaymuch]

"FUCK!"

Teller is, clearly, starting to lose his calm.


He also does not want to go anywhere near that thing, now.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

His choice, then. Either head back into the utterly dark and dead Metro station that smells like foot and see about finding another exit, or edge up the part of the stairs that doesn't have dead greenskin all over it and make a run for the surface.

[doesntsaymuch]

He decides to take the third option (which may or may not be entirely wise, he realises too late).

His case is full of aluminium foil balls that he's not using, so he throws them at the big green thing.


Ya know, just to make sure that it's properly dead.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

Poink. Poink. Poink.

If it's not dead, it's got a certain Zen equanimity to it. Perhaps it is contemplating the mysteries of the wall.

[doesntsaymuch]

Teller looks back over his shoulder at the very creepy subway station. And then up at the light again.

Okay, this thing is probably dead. It probably won't try to rip his head off.

Dead things tend to smell rather unpleasant, though. So he pulls a handkerchief from his jacket and ties it over his face before trying to brave the stairs.


Yep, his handkerchief will protect him.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

Better than nothing. And the stairs do lead out into daylight...

... and the sight of a massive, fortified trench system sprawling as far east as the half-shattered Capitol dome and west as the gutted Washington Monument.

So.

Yeah.

[doesntsaymuch]

What. The. Fuck?

Forget Kansas. Teller doesn't think he's even on earth, by this point.

It occurs to him that the big dead thing was, well, dead. Which means that logically, there's something even bigger and badder that was able to kill it.


Suddenly, he doesn't want to be outside any more.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

There's doors behind him, if that helps at all? Several of them, and they look... well, repaired at least. So someone's been taking care of those? They lead into a reasonably sturdy building with a couple of tattered images of what might be mammoths (hard to say, they're very old and very faded) hanging from this or that projection of the facade.

[doesntsaymuch]

Well, he's not going back down there toward the dead thing. That's for sure.

Seriously, what was that?

Teller decides that he'd rather not think about it. Going inside sounds like a good idea, so that's what he does. He just hopes that whoever's been taking care of these doors is friendly, and not the whatever-it-was that killed the green thing.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

Beyond there lies a lobby, lit by a pair of work lamps that seem to be hooked up to generators. Or possibly very large and noisy battery packs, it's hard to say. The place has something of the feel of the Museum of Natural History back on 81st and Central Park West, an impression that the reasonably well-mounted woolly mammoth in the room beyond does nothing to counter. (Although whoever set up the Tyrannosaurus skeleton needs to be shot; it's mounted Godzilla-style rather than with its head low and its tail out behind it, and the skull is lying in pieces on the floor.) That room is lit not only by electric, but by light leaking in through high curved windows, and arched doorways running off in different directions are marked with faded but legible signs:

1861-1865 The Presidency of Abraham Lincoln
1941-1945 American Military Might of World War II
2066-2077 Alaskan Liberation from the Red Chinese
2052-Present The Resource Wars

And if that wasn't enough, there is the last, largest doorway. This one is done up to resemble a great wall of grey stone, with alcoves to either side of the central doors, and with a stylized human skull formed out of the faux stone in the center. The arch beneath the skull merely says 'Underworld Journey'. For all that, it shows the most signs of being recently used: a strip of threadbare but clean red carpet, an ashtray off to one side, and a faint smell of tobacco smoke.

[doesntsaymuch]

Abraham Lincoln and World War II are the only parts of this building that make any sense.

He's very torn about this whole Skull Door thing. It does seem well maintained (especially against everything else), but the skull is giving off mixed-signals.

Skulls mean pirates and poison and other things that are generally unpleasant.

He's not really sure what to do, so he just sort of lingers for a bit outside the door.


After all, this seems fairly safe, right here.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

So of course that's the cue for the walking corpse in the rather nice Fiftiesesque pink dress to push open the door from the inside and light up her cigarette.

.... the ash had to come from somewhere.

[doesntsaymuch]

Teller jumps at the sight of the zombie that would make George Romero piss himself.

Normally, when things get seriously strange, he tends to use Penn as a sort of human shield.


Penn is not around, so he uses his attaché case, instead, holding it in front of his chest.